Sunday, April 26, 2015

What If I Told You Bitcoins Aren't Real — Live-Tweeted Mystery "The Golden Parachute" Continues

Here are Week 118 @Twitstery tweets of The Golden Parachute, the amazing new sequel to Executive Severance!

"What didn't she believe?" "Anything." I thought back to when I stood in my underwear before the bar while the judge reviewed the charges.

The judge had asked if Granger had a twin brother AND a doppelgänger. The truth hit me like a swift gut punch! I stood naked before the law!

All morning in court I watched defendant after defendant plead guilty or bargain a plea to a lesser charge. No way I was going that route.

I pointed to Rixey and said "Your Honor, this travesty is the result of the animosity of that man! He needed a suspect and I fit the bill."

The judge glanced at Rixey who stared without expression. Turning back she said "YOU are accused of killing Willum Granger." “No, I’m not.”

"Excuse me?" "Not Willum, his twin brother, Farley." She looks back at the file "Right. Farley. Are you pleading guilty?" "No, I'm not."

"Your Honor, I don't know which Granger came into my office that day. I do know I didn't kill him, or his brother or his doppelgänger."

The judge then asked the bailiff. "Where is this man's counsel?" He replied "Defendant waived counsel." "Is this true?" "Yes, your Honor."

"Do you know who said 'A man who is his own lawyer has a fool for his client'?" "Lincoln. It doesn't mean a man with a lawyer isn't a fool."

She stared, then turned to Rixey "Do you have anything to say?" Rising, he replied "Your Honor, this man is a danger to himself and others."

"I get your point. However, I see no cause to hold him." She pounded the gavel. "Detective Arkaby, I release you on your own recognizance."

They prepped for their next case. I said "Your Honor, I don't want to be released." The judge looked up from her documents. "Excuse me?"

"I can't go out like this. I've lost my clothes." "You have no clothes?" "Do you think I would appear in court like this if I did?" "Maybe."

"I can get someone to spring me if you let me make a call." "Make your call. You don't need court approval." "Can you lend me a quarter?"

The judge said "Bailiff?" "Your Honor?" "Will you please give this man a quarter?" "Sorry, no change." "Can ANYONE give this man a quarter?"

The silence in the courtroom was vast. The judge repeated "Anyone?" Then Rixey said "Oh hell!" dug into his pocket and tossed me two bits.

I caught his toss. It wasn't money, it was a flash drive. I said "I need two bits. What's this?" Rixey replied "Not just two bits. Bitcoin."

The flash drive was unlabeled. "How many bits is this?" Rixey smiled "Enough to make your call." "On a public pay phone?" "Just plug it in."

How many bits did a Bitcoin hit if a Bitcoin did hit bits? 2 bits? 4 bits? 6 bits? A dollar? Rixey made me want to stand up and holler!

The bailiff said "That drive won't work on our pay phones." Rixey continued smiling. I said "Thanks for nothing." "Happy to do my bit."

"As always. Just a little bit. "I tossed the Bitcoin drive which Rixey caught and pocketed. The judge said "Does anybody ELSE have change?"

(The Twitter Mystery continues daily at @Twitstery)

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